Chosen

About a month ago, a friend of 20 years asked me to be her Matron of Honor.  Of course I was excited to do it and honored that she would ask me!  Especially because our contact has been very limited.  She moved to California then recently to Austin and started a life.  I stayed in San Antonio and started my own.  I hadn't seen her in a really long time.  We had spoken a few times here and there but quite honestly, in my mind, it wasn't to where I deserved by any means to be her Matron of Honor.  I suppose her thoughts were different.
Days and months went by and in all that time my only task was to get my dress she bought for me.  It is a gorgeous dress and to top it all off, it's PURPLE, a color that has huge prophetic meaning to me in this season of my life.  So as you can imagine I was ecstatic!
The rehearsal dinner was finally here and I was hitching a ride to Austin with her sister-in-law, Cindy.  When Cindy called me to settle logistics for pick up, she asked me a question that got my head spinning in all sorts of directions and instantly placed a yoke of guilt and shame over me.  "Monica, do you know if Melynda has her something new, something borrowed and something blue?" Boom!!! Right then and there my heart sank and I even got flushed with embarrassment!!!
Oh my gosh!!! What had I done?? Or more accurately...look at everything I HAVE NOT DONE!!!  As soon as I hung up I went to Bing and looked up all the responsibilities of a Matron of Honor.  I was horrified!!! I did none, not one, of those things listed, from going to the food tasting to helping her shop for her dress, nothing, NOTHING!!! I couldn't believe it! The worst part is that it never even occurred to me to look up what my duties were! I never once said, "hmmm, how can I help my friend?"  I felt awful to say the least. Of course I called Melynda straight away and told her how I realized that I probably had certain responsibilities about which I didn't even offer to do anything. I told her how sorry I was and that I loved her.  She was so full of kindness and love that I all I could do was sit in humility and accept her grace towards me.
When the big day was said and done, I can't even count how many people came up to me to thank me for being such a good matron of honor, each expressing how Melynda had mentioned what an amazing help I had been.  All I could do was nod and say, "thank you." Every now and then I would add,  "but really I did nothing!"  Apparently Melynda felt differently.
As I sat and pondered it all, I couldn't help but notice the Lord speaking to me so gently about how much He loves me, and about how this whole thing with Melynda's wedding was just a prophetic utterance of how it is with Him towards me!  You see, I may not have done anything a Matron of Honor should do and I certainly wasn't qualified to be a Matron of Honor based on the fact that I didn't even realize that I had certain jobs to accomplish.  BUT I WAS CHOSEN!  She chose me! We hadn't talked often, we hadn't caught up as much as I would think a best friend should but she chose me anyway.  And that's exactly what I felt Jesus was saying to me!  "Monica I love you! I chose you, regardless of your past, I chose YOU!  Your striving and obsessiveness in trying to please me is really unnecessary because since BEFORE I even formed you in the womb, I already knew and APPROVED of you (as my chosen instrument), and BEFORE you were born I separated you and set you apart and consecrated you!!!"  Well, as you can imagine, I cried my eyes out, completely humbled by the love of my dad, my savior, my all in all. 
And as if Melynda's show of grace wasn't enough, as my Matron gift she bought me a book I have been yearning to own! HA! Did I deserve it? NO! Did I earn it? Absolutely not! It was a gift, underserved and unearned, much like His grace is toward you and me! Praise be to GOD!!!!